I haven't had alot of time to blog these days... spending lots of time with my baby! Some days are better than others... I'm worried about PPD... I've cried a few times because I've been so tired and I feel like I don't know what I'm doing... but I just have to take a step back and everything is okay... and Adam is supportive and does his part and more...

So... my need to network: I don't want to go back to my job. I despise it. I have never hated a job like I've hated this one. I was told back in late February that I had 40 hours of PTO, or Vacation time, that I could use as my maternity leave pay.. it even showed up on my paystubs from that time! Well, when the check came that it was supposed to be on, low and behold! It wasn't there! So, I called about it and all they could say was "it was a mistake and it shouldn't have been on the paystubs" and whoever told me, was wrong.

...

So, I was screwed out of money that Adam and I really needed to pay our power bill. I had to call the LIEAP office (I had put in an application two weeks prior) and tell them I couldn't pay because my work screwed me out of nearly $300.


I don't want to go back to this job. So I want to network. Soon I'll have a sewing machine and I did the math... if I made 4 corsets at $150-$200 a pop, I would be able to stay at home with my daughter. Thats a huge reason I don't want to go back to work. My daughter. When I think I about leaving her in the care of someone I don't know, either a baby sitter or at a day care... I start bawling! And everyone I would trust to care for her, has a job. So I'm stuck... Adam's even talking about getting a second job so I don't have to go back to work. I would never see him!!! So I want to network and start making corsets, custom clothes and costumes. I want to start a myspace page with examples and all that so I can get the ball rolling. I REALLY need this. So very badly. I'm even looking into doing Pampered Chef and Mary Kay so I don't have to go back to work at Mr. Tux!


I don't want to leave my baby girl... so if anyone knows anyone who's looking for unique clothes or corsets, if you could send them my way that would be AWESOME. But not yet... I need to get a sewing machine first!